Monday, June 13, 2011

I am a Black Man...My Weekend was my Reminder

Extremely interesting weekend...frustrating too. I lost my cool. Usually, I am able to ignore pathetic ignorance, shocking stupidity, overbearing arrogance, and ridiculous stereotypical assumptions. 

But, I had enough when a white woman immediately reached for her purse when I approached the area where she was seated. I was simply looking out a window at Panera Bread searching for my brunch date. She was late! Interestingly, the white female did not secure her purse when a male yuppie stepped near her. He obviously was looking and waiting for his date too. I discovered that when he began to get excited like a little girl who was preparing for her first date when his partner arrived. Their embrace was one that I soon had with my female companion…I must say that the expression of male on male love witnessed appeared to be genuine. Completely different from my next brush with insult.

Like I typically do on Saturday morning, I was headed for a walk. On my right was an elderly Indian woman. As I approached at a good distance from her to my left, the frail woman remarkably became a race walker. She darted for her belongings which were sitting on the side walk directly in path. Initially, I was thrown-off by her sudden JR talent. 

 John Riggins

Then I got a clue…she apparently wanted to secure her Bag Lady bags. As if I wanted some roach invested clothing hampers. I stopped…looked at her as she hovered over her cheap belongings then I exclaimed, “Look lady. I don’t care about your damn bags. You have not one item I want. And, you and your light skin people best stop treating me like an Untouchable. Like a Dalit. Get a damn clue.” 

 
*Indian governments have been violently brutal to the darker people of their culture. 

Sticking together is usually the last alternative for African Americans and Africans. Over the years, I have found it difficult to detect collective unity among black people like I have witnessed in the Toco Hills area of Decatur, Georgia. There the Jewish population is abundantly predominant – and their power is quite persuasive. Well, it has been with the Kroger Company. A few weeks ago, a coalition of Jewish men and women who happen to be Kroger customers lobbied and pressured the Kroger corporate office and store manager at the Toco Hill’s location to stop running an audio announcement that was repeatedly played in the store. The brief pork sale commercial was history within four days. Sadly - the slave, 1960’s discrimination, and Jim Crow historical accounts have plagued black people so much that we have issues with greeting each other. I was being friendly –I usually wear my goofy elation on my shoulder and my joy is always accompanied by a bleached teeth smile- unfortunately my happy ‘Hello’ was not received by the beautiful black female that I held a door for and spoke to Sunday morning: “Hello. How are you? What a pretty day!” She glared at me and snipingly asked, “Dang, why are you so happy?” No, thank you. No salutation in return. But, she was dressed for church…Typical Black Female Christian in Atlanta: Mad, High & Mighty, and Single.


Speaking of ‘typical’, I decided to go down to the pool that I clean every other day. 


Surprisingly, the pool was full of children. It was melting pot of kids. African Americans, Caucasians, Latinos, and Indians. The parents were either in the pool or sitting in the lounge chairs…except for a couple Indian moms. These two precipitously petrified mommas were in my chlorinated water fully clothed. How many times do I have to tell them, “No street clothes permitted in pool”? Damn! I did not say a word. They did not give me a chance to. They hurried their children out of the pool as I entered the pool that I maintain! A mass exodus…because a black man got in the pool. The white momma stayed. She’s intrigued by my big feet…

*Indians need to understand they are three steps from Negroid. 

Lastly, another lily – and significantly overweight white female offended me. I was definitely in line. Yes I was! Or, I became invisible. She looked right through me as if I were a non-human. As if I did not matter. I was of no consequence to her. A void. As if I were an

Understanding that I am Somebody…what hurt me the most was the way my church-going sista ignored me with obvious contempt. As if I were a

*A black person or nigger who looks particularly sneaky.

And, believe me all my weekend run-ins were terribly unsettlingly.Thankfully, I was finally treated like a Black Man by a loving Black Woman who looks like this Beauty:

Kelis
The Shadow

Friday, June 3, 2011


Mothers Raise Daughters and Love Sons

After all these years I am convinced that this statement is true.

Mothers are forever raising their girls to be good girls. We know what comes with that: appropriate mannerism, comforting tendencies, unrelenting compassion, respectful language, and longwinded patience. Someone (a female) is probably thinking, ‘That’s the way I was raised…but I do not see that type of rearing today.’

To be honest, I rarely interface with teen and 20-something females with the above personality traits. I guess I hang out at the wrong coffee shops, the wrong Target, the wrong grocery store, and/or the wrong bookstore. And, I know for a fact that they are not at the mega churches.

What I see regularly are wandering spirits. Unsecure and insecure souls! I see neglected-daddy girls searching for a place within their womanhood. Unfortunately, in the search they often times latch onto the likes of women who display their natural femminity via their superficial sexuality.


Why? Because mommas have failed to love Avis, Beverly, Chantel, and/or Danielle. Really love them like they love Anthony, Bobby, Chad, and/or Doug.
In the complex effort to assure they grow-up to be respectable women, moms neglect to create an adoring relationship with daughter.

Why? Because momma was told by her mother and grandmother that, ‘You have to be a lady. You better not get pregnant, you better keep your legs closed and you better not have sex!’


Certainly, there is nothing out of order with keeping the legs crossed to prevent causal sexual intercourse and pre-marital pregnancies. But, where was/is the LOVE in mama’s mandate? Why was/is there an unloving and threatening demand that typically results in momma-daughter contention?
Could it be because momma regarded her girl as an ‘item’ to prepare, repair or fix most likely for a rottenly loved boy; not a well-balanced man?

When we prepare/fix something we don’t think to love what needs repairing. We just focus on the fixing. The repairing. After the item is in working condition we leave it…we leave it in place until we are ready to use the item again.

There is no LOVE in what we believe to be in need of FIXING.

We need to stop raising our daughters to be someone’s Utility of Perfection.

We need to love on our girls like we love on our boys. However, in this love that’s desperately needed it is my hope and prayer that we do not implement what we have with our boys, Coddling.


Let’s eradicate the raising of Hope and the spoiling of

Kanyes
Let’s replace both -raising and spoiling- with Teaching and Nurturing, and Teach to be citizens of the world

C.D. Glin served in South Africa from 1997-1999 and currently, is the Director of the Office of Intergovernmental Affairs and Partnerships with the Peace Corps
and Nurture to be


The Shadow